The Roasted Salt Co. - Made with PRIDE, Seasoned with LOVE

Fioina Starks-Thomson and Sarah Starks-Thomson of Roasted Salt Co.

By Robin Allen

I found Roasted Salt Co. one day by pulling up behind a white van at a 4-way stop in downtown Hood River. On the bumper it said “LGBTQ Owned” and “Black Lives Matter” and I immediately thought to myself “Who’s in there?” “How do I not know them?”.  So, as I anxiously awaited as the van turned, it revealed the name of the business as “Roasted Salt Co.” I immediately went to Instagram (@theroastedsaltco) to look them up and saw they had posted that they were going to be at the Hood River Farmer’s Market that very day! So, my husband and I immediately turned around and went. And the rest, is well, salts, rubs and seasonings!

The Explorer Pack for those wanting to sample a several of the salts their company offers.

So, after grabbing a nice sampling of married couple and owners, Sarah and Fiona’s Tasty Taco Seasoning, Salt Meats Coffee Rub, The Smokey-est Blend Seasoning and The Explorer Pack, we were hooked, and I just had a feeling their story would be as good as their products. And, well, I was right.

I recently sat down with Sarah and Fiona and we talked about their journey of their very different experiences of coming out to finding love across oceans to getting married twice to moving from a diverse city to a rural, small community as a gay, married couple to a happy accident that turned into a business, the continued search for acceptance within their community and the rightful and brave decision to take a stand and take up space!

ROBIN ALLEN:  I’m so glad you two were up for this interview! So, first off, where did you two grow up? Was it here in The Dalles?

SARAH STARKS-THOMSON:  I originally grew up in the Bay Area. Specifically, East Bay.

FIONA STARKS-THOMSON:  I was born and raised in a small village in Scotland.

FST:  And then when I met Sarah, we moved to Edinburgh for two years until I got my visa.

SST:  Yeah, and then from there we came back to The States and bought a farm in Goldendale, WA. And then have most recently moved to The Dalles.

RA:  Oh, wow.  What a journey for both of you! I have so many questions!  You two grew up in VERY different environments.  How was it for each of you? Especially as young gay females?

SST:  Well, growing up in the East Bay, which is still very liberal,  I didn't have a lot of openly gay or knowingly gay people that I knew of in my community. It wasn't a conversation that was talked about. There were still restrictions on that. So, when I was at the point of coming out, I was in high school and Prop 8, which was the bill to keep gay marriage illegal in California, was coming up for a vote.  And, I soon found out that my own Mom was for PROP 8 and was actively voting for it as well. It caused me to take a big step back.

SST:  I never thought I'd be in this situation where I couldn't be myself with someone I care about.  You know, when I came out, I thought I came out and I didn't get kicked out that everything would be fine.  But the fact that my Hero, my Mom, told me that I wasn't gay at all when I came out? Well, I was not expecting straight up denial.  I wasn’t prepared for that. 

SST:  And even though I just kept feeling “something’s not right”, I kept excusing her behavior telling myself she grew up with it. It was embedded in her.  So, I’m gonna give her a pass.  But then, I got to a point where I was like “Hold up. I also grew up with that.”  And, I’m not about to give myself a pass. So why am I giving her one? 

SST:  So, I took that step back and truly realized her beliefs were wrong. What she had been teaching me was wrong.  And, she wasn’t respecting my reality, so I made a decision.

RA:  I’m sorry that you can't have that relationship that you deserve to have with your Mom. But I'm glad that you found your identity and your voice enough to stand up for what you believe and choose LOVE.

SST:  YES! Thank you.

SST:  So then, when I decided go to college, I told myself, if the question comes up, I'm gonna be “out”.  And, it was my first time of really taking a stance and realizing that when I did, the world didn’t fall apart. And, that I CAN tell people and it was okay.

RA:  Right. Good.

SST:  So for me, going through all that as I grew up and continue to grow up, I can honestly say this is the most comfortable I've ever felt in my skin.  

RA:  That’s so awesome to hear Sarah!  

RA:  So Fiona, did you have a similar experience to Sarah’s?

FST:  No. I had a really different experience than what Sarah had. So, my uncle Kevin is gay and one of my other family members as well as a few other people in town. So, I did have openly gay people around me.

My family also doesn’t really talk about stuff.  There wasn't like a whole sit down feely-feely kind of coming out.  I actually told my mom on my lunch in a car park so I had an exit strategy in case it didn’t go well. 

FST:  But, I actually think my sister told my parents before I ever did. And, that was kinda of it.

RA:  Wow. How old were you? 

FST:  I was like nineteen. 

RA:  So, we’re lucky that you’re family was OK with it.

FST:  Yeah, but I think it’s interesting. At our wedding, we overheard my uncle and my Dad talking.  They were talking about my cousin who had just came out at our wedding!  And, my Dad was saying to my uncle “Well, it doesn't matter just as long as they're happy.” And it was just a refreshing conversation to overhear. Because my dad is not like, an emotional person. Like I said, none of my family is.  So, when we overheard my Dad say that, it was validation that “Oh, he does care.”

RA:  How cool.

FST: Yeah…

FST:  And these last couple of years, I kind of sat back and really thought about my growing up and my story. it was more of really trying to find myself.  Because, I was a follower.  I was never myself as a youngster.  I was never my own person.  I never just put myself out there to do my own thing.  I was always following someone else.

RA: Right. It wasn’t so much about your “label” of being gay…as it was more about discovering your identity and who Fiona is?

FST:  It was definitely more about “Who am I?”.  So, I’ve really just tried to find myself and who I want to be. And where I want to go with my life. 

RA:  Cool.

FST:  So yeah, I really didn’t have the experiences that Sarah had at all.

RA: Very different.

FST: Yeah. Very different.

RA:  Thank you ladies for sharing your early journeys with me.  Now, here’s the question; how DID you two meet? Especially, with how different your paths were at the time?

SST:  We met online.  I had recently gone through a breakup, and I kind of lost the group of friends that went along with that relationship.  And, I was just feeling very alone.  So I went onto a dating site with a forum called Pink Sofa.  I put out a search criteria. And it wasn't finding anyone date-wise in my area. And so, you had an option of looking at who else was online beyond your area who might be a match. And, somebody who was a similar age as me in Scotland popped up.  And I thought, “Oh, that would be fun to talk to somebody in Scotland.” 

SST:  So, I sent a message. And then we started sending, like, five page long emails to each other every day and then we eventually switched to Skype.

RA: Wow! 

SST:  And then, after talking nonstop for four months straight, I went over to Scotland and visited.  Fiona and I were just friends up until then.  But, when I actually got there and we met, I was like “Ah crap I’m in it!” 

ALL: (laughs)

RA:  Wowza! What a whirlwind. So, first came love…then came marriage! How soon after your first encounter did you two get married?

SST:  It was about 2 years.  I was almost 25.

FST: And, I was 23. 

RA:  Where did you get hitched?

FST:  Well, do you want the legal ceremony or the non legal ceremony?

RA: Both!

SST:  We had a traditional style ceremony in Scotland.

FST: My sister officiated. 

SST:  We got to have a lot of friends there. We rented out a hall and it was really just like a beautiful thing and we think of it as our wedding.

SST:  But, we hadn’t done though, was check to see whether or not marriage was legal in Scotland. We just figured it was because it passed in Ireland.

FST:  And when we looked further into it, it was like, “Oh, damn we can’t stay here. We can’t marry here. It’s not legal.”  

SST:  And not only was it not legal, they wouldn’t even recognize our union.

RA:  Oh, man!

FST: So, Nov. 5th became the day we legally got married.

SST:  Yes, but, it’s not the date we celebrate.  We had the legal wedding in California. We went to City Hall in San Francisco, which was still beautiful and gorgeous, and I got to have my friends there, which I loved. But, there was still a part of me that was just so angry that we had to do it all twice.

RA:  Right?! That had to have been very frustrating.  But, I am so happy that you two were able to legally get married even if it did require two ceremonies! More love to spread around right? So, how long have you two lovebirds been together now?

SST: Totally. And, we’ve been together 10 years. 

FST:  And, we been married going on 8 years. 

RA:  Now, soon after you got married, you two ended up buying property in the rural, conservative community of Goldendale, WA.  Why there? Especially, since you were coming all the way the from the cultured, major city of Edinburgh, Scotland?

SST:  Actually, when we were looking for places to live, we had a map on our wall, and we had shaded out the nine states that we could legally be married in.  

SST:  And I mean, it's a privilege to even say that really.  There were so many people before us that couldn’t even consider being married.  But, that is why we chose Washington State instead of Oregon, because Oregon didn’t recognize gay marriage at the time.  And, it was very important to be able to live somewhere where we could be out and be married.  To truly respect those that came before us.

RA:  Woah. Right on. 

SST:  After we decided what state we were gonna live in, we then made this long list of things that were important to us to help us decide on what type of property we wanted. And, oddly enough, community and culture wasn't one of them. It was just something we took for granted that was always there in other places, including small towns, that we lived. So it wasn't until after we bought our property and settled in that we were like, huh, something's missing. 

SST:  We were asking ourselves, “What do we need to be comfortable?” And just completely forgot our need for community.  People that vote the same as us was not something that we even saw as important. We were looking at climate change and rising waters when we were looking at buying farmland.  We weren't looking at, “Can we go to the grocery store together without somebody walking past and sneering at us?”

RA:  Geez. Right?

SST:  And it wasn't until we really started being ourselves in the community that it became VERY clear we were one of very few openly gay people that the town had ever met.  It definitely made us realize even more how important community was to us.  We just had never felt this in the other small communities we had lived in.

RA: Right. So, how did the town’s lack of familiarity with gay people “become clear”?

SST:  Well we would get a lot of “Your sisters”.  For example, we ran into a woman we had given our business card to and she said “I finally get it. You two are sisters. The same last name of course!” You mean our hyphenated last name? No, no.  We are very much wife and wife.  And, we’d get a similar response at the markets too. So, we just started adjusting how we talked to purposely come out more than we would have normally. 

SST:  I just got into saying “wife” a lot more. Because I didn’t want people to assume something else. THIS. IS. MY. WIFE.  People have literally fought with their blood, sweat and tears for the right for us to be married and it is really important to me to be correctly labeled because of that.  

RA:  Wow. Yes. It is so important we honor the people who have paved the way and being proud of that. Kudos!

SST:  And then, when we did establish we were gay, we would get “Oh, my mom's hairdresser is gay,”  which was kind of a way of trying to connect, but it definitely still made us feel very much like outsiders.

RA:  Right. Right!  So, how did you try and do that? Find other community? Friends?

FST:  Yeah, I definitely knew I was gonna have to go and find some other people.

FST:  So, in Scotland, I worked as an Optical Assistant for a while.  But, when I came over to The States, I realized that none of my qualifications or certificates crossed over.  So, I was like, “Oh, well”, maybe I'll just go and look for something else. So, I got into doing dog training and grooming. 

RA:  Oh, cool. That’s different. How did you find that gig? Or did it find you?

FST:  We were boarding our dogs at Cascade Pet Camp in Hood River, and we went to pick up our dogs. I thought I’m gonna ask if they have any job openings.  And they did. And, I ended up working there for about five years.  But, I eventually had to leave.  Grooming ended up being my downfall. It just ruined my back, and I just couldn’t do it anymore.

RA: Oh no.

FST:  But, it was all good.  I learned a lot of skills.  And, the skills that I learned from grooming actually transferred to so many different things.  

RA:  Yeah. And I imagine you were also dealing with a lot of different temperaments as well. With the animals and their human parents.  It’s almost like counseling.

FST:  Yeah. It's very much like counseling.  There was a lot of problem-solving too. It changed the way I look at and approach other things now.  Especially in small business. But, I did end up makin’ some really good friends too, and that was the main goal.

RA:  I feel like as you did more and more markets you started to meet more people and vendors that we were definitely more aligned with you right?

SST:  YES!  For sure. We love the connections and collaborations aspect a lot. We get to use fellow vendors’ products to help enhance our own.  And, I just think the end result ends up being that much more special because we are all aligned.

RA:  Well, that sounds like the definition of community to me. 

SST + FST: YES!

 RA:  So, speaking of finding your community, since the official launch of Roasted Salt Co. you two have been doing the farmer’s markets full time.  Do you always hang a Pride flag up at your booth? Or does it depend on the “vibe” of the market?

SST:  YES! We hang it up at every market.  It’s a simple act and it's something we can do that has a lot of meaning behind it.  And, we’ve always said that we want our booth to be known as a safe space wherever we are.

RA:  SO cool.  I feel like it's a way of seeking out not just safety, but also alignment.  You're calling out to the community that you want and are trying to build, and you're claiming your space, which you rightfully deserve.  You’re saying we are here, and that’s awesome.

SST:  Yes. You’re right. We are definitely creating the space that we want around us. At first we were kind of amazed at the amount of people the Pride flag drew actually.

FST:  A lot of young people.

SST:  Yeah, whole families would walk past and one of the kids would run back and whisper “I like your flag”.  And, we’ll also have people come up and go, “I just want you to know my cousin's gay.” And people just being able to say that to us is amazing.  Because they're reaching out and saying, “I accept you, I'm okay with you. And, I’ve had that similar experience in my family.” And, you know, maybe that's not something that they can share with people around them. But, at our booth, they get to reach out and say something and in turn, allows us to know that they are an ally as well.

RA:  Totally.  That’s so great.

FST:  Although, it shouldn’t have to be like this. People shouldn't have to continuously, even out with their families, look for a safe place. 

RA: You’re right.  It’s not all rainbows for sure.  Have you ever had to deal with negative reactions with displaying your beliefs at your both? If so, how have you navigated that?

SST:  Yeah.  We've definitely had the opposite. Like, last year at the farmers market, the opening day, we were donating 50% of our sales to “Black Lives Matter”. And this was right after George Floyd and everything was happening and all protests and stuff. And, we actively had people walk up to our booth, see our “50% of sales will go “Black Lives Matter” sign and vocally sneer and walk away. And we were like alright, fine. But, they know that this is what we stand for. And that's why it's on the back of our van too because it’s literally the least we can do is to say “Black Lives Matter”.  And we’re okay losing sales for that.

RA:  I agree.  And, going back to the rainbow side of things, you also GAIN new customers too! I mean, that’s why we’re all here right now right? Because I followed your van! 

ALL: (laughs)

SST:  We have also put “Queer owned" on our bottles too. Because I want someone to be sitting around the dinner table and go, “Hey, these deviled eggs are really good. What do you put on them?” And they show them our product, and they read the label and we have reached one more person. Just our little touch of diversity in your home.

RA: SO cool.  So, how was Roasted Salt Co. born?

SST:  Actually, we started the salts as a side project when we started doing the farm.

FST:  Yeah, the salts were not planned at all.  It was a complete accident.

SST:  It’s true.  First, we focused on chickens and eggs.  And we called our farm “The Hen’s Nest”.

RA:  Cute. 

SST:  And, we were selling out of eggs at the markets. And we were like, “Oh, shoot, we can't make more eggs.”  We needed something else to sell. 

SST:  So, the previous year, I had made up some Christmas gifts for friends that were just little seasoning things in jars.  And that came out of just not having money to buy gifts.  I think I'd gotten the idea from Better Homes and Gardens, and it was a make-your-own gift sort of thing.

RA: DIY gifts are the best!

The Smokey-est Seasoning Blend will put a twist on your deviled eggs.

SST:  So, when I did the gifts, I did a garlic, salt and pepper blend.  The magazine had suggested roasting the garlic. But, I didn't read the directions, and I just threw it all in. And then, I didn't set a timer because why would I do that? 

RA: HA!

SST:  And, of course, the garlic burned and the pepper tasted gross. But, the salt…the salt didn't really change that much. 

RA: Interesting. 

SST: So, that was in the back of my head when we were preparing for the next show that was a home and garden show, and I was, like, I'm gonna make some seasonings and see how it goes.

RA: Cool.

The Roasted Salt Co. is a regular fixture at The Dalles Farmers Market.

SST:  So, from there it just started and kind of steamrolled into what started as just trying to get an extra 25 or 50 bucks a week at the markets to we think this could be a real thing.  I think we might HAVE to do this.

RA:  Yeah, you created a demand. Right? That’s a key part of business for sure. So cool.

SST:  Exactly. We accidentally created the demand for it. And, since our official launch in 2018, we are still scratching that creative itch and still playing around with what we could come up with. And, each time we do a market, we kind of treat it like a test kitchen.  We just don’ want to “go big” right now.  We believe in quality over quantity and we feel if we expand too quickly the product will start losing its soul, and we will start losing our passion for it. And, that’s just not worth it to us.

RA:  So what's some advice that you can give small business entrepreneurs, especially to the BIPOC or LGBTQ+ community sense?

FST:  I would say, just go for it.  Even if you're uncomfortable.  If you want to do something, and you know that you have it, but you're too afraid, to just go out there.  Don’t be. Just do it.  You will eventually find your niche, your community, your people. And you might have to go through some difficult, uncomfortable situations, but it doesn’t represent who you are. It's just representing what other people are projecting onto you. So it doesn't matter. Focus on finding your community and just DO YOU!

RA: Wow!  That’s real good.

SST:  Yeah, we believe in what we do. And, it’s so easy to get caught up.  So, remember, it’s okay to take it slowly. There's nothing wrong with that. We all need balance. And, putting your mental health and relationships first is extremely important.  It’s been really good for us as a couple and business partners too.

RA:  Yes! Well said.

SST:  And, it’s also a lot of communication.  It’s the balance of knowing what someone's comfortable doing within the business and where your and their passions lie and respecting that. We know each other well enough to know when something's coming from a positive place versus a negative place, and I think having that communication really helps. It can make all the difference.

RA: What fantastic advice to end on.  Thank you so much ladies for taking the time to share your story, your journey, your love with us. I could think of no better way to celebrate PRIDE.

You can find The Roasted Salt Co. on Instagram at @theroastedsaltco

And for The Dalles Farmer’s Market info click here.

Sarah says see you at the market!